I'm back in England

After 15 hours of getting from one country to the next... which wasn't such a bad trip knowing my track record, it was actually quite an enjoyable one this time around... I have done a lot of things over the past few days...

1. Shopping = new laptop, new router, enough food to go by
2. Updated my RPoL games = making nearly half a dozen new threads is not easy, especially if you go through a time lapse
3. Cleaned my room = it's not that my room was untidy when I got here, but with the stuff that I brought back with me, I had to reorganize a lot of things, put away everything I won't need for this academic year and make room for all those papers I'll inevitably get from my tutors this year
4. Cleaned the refrigerator = because going by the amount of unclean dishes in the sink, how empty and frozen the fridge was and all those pizza boxes lying around I'm apparently the only using that thing
5. I informed my landlord of my return
6. I went through all the letters I got...

Here's the thing, aside from the bills that I'll split up with one other room-mate, I received a very peculiar letter. Apparently, everyone who was living here the previous year must pay council tax!

See, in England you pay this thing called council tax by which your money goes to the city council, police and fire brigade... it's all cool if not for the simple fact that we are all full-time students, thus exempt from this tax. What's even more annoying is that I'm apparently the only one living here from the previous year, so I have to go to the city council now and someone make it apparent I not only shouldn't have been required to pay but I'm also incapable of paying 1,514.18 pounds...

on top of that, I still have letters to write...

The Wyrm made me do it...

Instructions:
Take a picture of yourself right now.
Don’t change your clothes, don’t fix your hair - just take a picture.
Post that picture with NO editing.

Post these instructions with the picture.

This ended up long...

It's been a very long time since I last updated. As I told Exmiscellanea yesterday, it's about time I give you people some explanation why you had to endure without me rambling maddeningly into the internet void (how you did that, I have no idea)...

It all happened simple. I wanted to make some changes in my lifestyle, be a bit more outgoing and sign up for something (like martial arts classes). Alas that did not work because the moment my mom heard about it she shouted me down for being inconsiderate, uncaring and egoistic. Which also marked the first time I was ever called egoistic, after years of counsellors telling me I should be more egoistic instead of only thinking about others. She also got mad that I didn't want to spend most of my summer at my grandfather's. While I like it there, resting in an isolated area runs counter-productive to achieving a more outgoing lifestyle.

Next up was my grandfather getting dizzy and having headaches. That in turn resulted in his doctor calling for testing to see if he has brain bleeding. He turned out okay but due to the testing, he was in need of resting in bed to the extent he would need to lie there all day and night for a week. Unfortunately, with my grandfather the only possible way to relieve him of putting strain on his body through work is to take that strain away from him. In other words, I had to go there and work alongside him so he wouldn't work too much. In the meantime, I managed to go to Warsaw for a convention, mainly to talk with one person and get some things in order. I also bought a game and stuff.

My dad arrived for two weeks some time later, the first of which was spent in Masuria. The next had a cold war theme going on due to me receiving information on not passing a module... and the subsequent panic mode I naturally enter whenever something doesn't go as planned. The essay was being written, in the meantime I went once again to Warsaw for an anime convention with Vegael. It wasn't the greatest experience, but I got some cool merchandise (I'm such a geek). My soul was also consumed by Death Note before I managed to finish the essay.

That being done, the only thing that needed to be taken care of was to clean my Bionicle collection. It was an epic task in and of itself, I'll have pictures to show its size up later on.

If you think that's all that's been keeping me up from being more internet active, I should mention a few more things. I tried to correspond via email every now and then. It may not have worked out as I wanted it to, but it's better than nothing. I find it really hard to concentrate when everyone is home and running around. If it wasn't for the noise that it would have caused, I'd write more in the morning instead of quietly reading internet gossip so as to not wake anyone up. Civilisation IV also got my soul, I spent most days playing it with my sister because she wanted to spend time together with me and considering I might not have that opportunity for more than a year from now on, I couldn't say no. Don't forget that as a Godfather, I have the duty to corrupt a baby so he can grow up into an evil mastermind to rule the world, babysitting is fun like that. Having the PC divided between 2-3 people wasn't helping my internetliness either...

At present, I still don't know what's up with my essay. I don't even know if it reached my tutor, much less whether or not I'll pass those classes. Vegael and I want to start a speculative fiction blog and I probably should put my games off hiatus but my head hurts so much, I think I'll do it after dinner.

Now that I think of it, maybe it's a good thing I didn't had time to edit a video I made shortly after arriving here. As you probably noticed, I look awful on videos... but that still doesn't mean I can't make videos about consuming horrible things that you probably didn't know existed! (like sorrel soup, for instance) As work and school started for my mom (she was on sick leave for a week) and sister, I have more time on my hands. Expect stuff being written...

Oh yeah, there was a Mozart CD in the mail yesterday... listening to it now!

I am seriously mad

I went to the shopping centre with a friend. He wanted to show me some laptops because I'm probably going to buy one soon. He gets in (with a backpack) but me, being behind, don't... because I had a backpack. I was then told to put it in deposit. Okay, not mad yet but when I saw the deposit. It's just a locker that you pay 2 PLN to get a key. Hardly any security for whatever I had with me, just paying for it to be under zero surveillance and in a crappy locker that you could get into with a strong punch. I'm basically expected to pay for paying the shop money... and this is something I don't agree with. I want quality for my money, not some cheap cheese cake with nil insurance and security.

but that wasn't the worst

What really got me mad happened later on. We went to get beer, me not liking beer that much means that the very fact of it makes me slightly annoying (but I'm trying this social drinking, so lately I've been drinking more than usual = more than nothing). Like always I am wearing a cap and that seems a problem for the security guard. I am suddenly a threat that needs to be dealt with. God forbid I have a nice time drinking with a buddy in the non-smoking area... an empty non-smoking area. I still can't understand why it would bother anyone. Even the people who came in and passed us didn't run shouting in terror at the sight of a cap on my head. The guard didn't agree, and he was polite enough to show his disagreement with quite vulgar statements and threats of violence... which happened after I left (my friend told me about it), I just didn't want to bother with someone of that calibre.

See, it would be a different thing if the local required all patrons to wear suits or had classical music. Then I would happily comply with the order (I just can't call that manner of speech a request). As it were, it seemed like an informal club, I came there being informal and that's apparently not the impression the club was aiming at.

I Hit you with my Mighty Fist

Last week I had something interesting happen right next to the block I live in, close enough to see and hear everything from a window.

That way during the evening, a few hours after a football (I'm European, don't forget) match ended. There are these three guys who curse at anyone moving in their vicinity. I come up to the window to close it because they were getting too loud and I had enough fresh air in the room.

One guy came up to them and started cursing back. Threats were made, use of fists and knives mentioned, the two guys going at each other looked like angry roosters... I didn't have any popcorn.

After the verbal exchange, the guy (who wore a red jacket) went away. I was about to go back from the balcony when the guy came back... with friends.

It turned out, his friends were only an audience. The red jacket guy went up to those three guys and hit each one of them in the face. One guy wanted to challenge him and they started to go at each other the same way as before but with fists and leg work. After a while, the guy decided it wasn't a fight he'd win so he backed off and turns around. At that point, the red jacket guy grabs him from behind and throws to the ground. As he kicks the guy, the other two run away.

Seven or so kicks to the head/chest later, red jacket guy leaves. The guy lies on the ground and isn't moving. A few minutes later, his buddies came back for him, tried to wake him up but apparently decided it'd be better to just carry the unconscious block home... or somewhere...

Even my mom watched, we found it quite entertaining... aren't we sociopaths?

Not the Best of Times

After spending time offline at my grandpa, my parents took us all to Masuria for a week.

Upon arrival back home I learned I didn't pass one of my modules so I need to redo my essay. I have a month to do that.

Internet access and my projects need to take the back-seat (again!).

I really am not enjoying myself this summer...

Identity Crisis?

There is one thing I have to say

Exmiscellanea is right.

I need to stop worrying about relationships and patterns and just do what I always do, ride the current of reality up to the release of death...

I think I'm getting into some crisis.
I'm beginning to realise that I need not only think of a career but something more than that. Life apparently isn't just about going home/work. I need to fill it with something more than that. Gaming would be the obvious choice, but for some reason my mind thinks of it as the opposite of socialising... that old stereotype of a basement geek.

There's a real torment of emotion in me right now. To the extent that I don't really know what's happening. Being home doesn't help one bit because everyone wants me to do something. I don't mind most of them, I wasn't here a long time so it's understandable that my family wants to spend time with me. Unfortunately, that leaves me with little time to do anything else, while my family might think otherwise, keeping up with friends is also important.

I feel kind of drained, not really sure what to do, even though I have my projects (like cleaning this room)... depression? Maybe... is it wrong to hope that I'll find a job after graduating so I don't have to come home and listen to my mom telling me what I need to do as if I was stuck in one chapter of life, like life is going to be exactly the same after graduating like it was before?

I just want to do something with myself instead of waiting for a better future that will not come. I hope this summer I'll manage to do a few things that I wanted to try but been constantly putting them off.

The seeds have been planted, it's a fast growing plant, I just need to cut it right and enjoy the camp fire stories...